Wah! Wah! Nope, that's not the sound of sirens roaring, coming to get you because you paid your taxes wrong again! That's the sound of a baby when it cries. Babies may communicate by crying, but they don't worry about taxes, either!
There's a lot of things babies do that we don't, and that's a tragedy. Babies have it made! They don't worry about a goddamn thing, except, of course, for where their next meal might be coming from. We could all benefit from this simple mindset that babies employ to stay relaxed every single day of the year. Here are the top 10 Things that Babies Do Every Single Day That You Should Do, Too.
1. Take A Nap
Babies be sleeping, yo! You should, too. It's a great way to melt the stress away midday, babay. Studies show that taking naps may increase sleep, dreaming, and rest.
2. Rest In Child's Pose
Babies are little yoga masters! The Child's Pose, named after St. Childs of Germania, is a great way to melt the stress away. Babies do it all the time and reportedly have very little tax-related stress. Coincidence? I think not.
3. Make Someone Smile
Being a baby isn't all selfish, yo! Studies show, again and again, that making someone else happy releases endorphins that help melt the stress away. Babies make people smile all the time, and look how happy they are! If you can't do it for other people, do it for yourself.
4. Cry When You Want Something
Wah! Wah! Like I said at the top, Babies Be Crying. But just because you're a big girl don't mean you can't cry, Fergie! Babies cry when they want something because they haven't figured out the right words to express themselves. Don't we all know how that feels? Four out of five doctors agree that ugly crying like a confused baby really helps melt the stress away.
5. Taste That Object You're Curious About
I don't mean this figuratively, baby! What does a baby do when it's curious about a mysterious shape it's never seen before? It Puts It In Its Mouth! Literally! You should try it, too. Getting a mouthfeel for whatever you are curious about is a great way to learn about it and melt the stress away.
6. Eat Soft Foods
And speaking of putting things in mouths... have you ever tried Gerber?! You probably liked it as a baby, but you'll love it as an adult! Soft food is easier to digest and easier to get than hard food. Babies eat soft food all the time and almost never have any stress to melt away.
7. Stare At A Stranger
Babies Be Starin', yo! Have you ever found yourself on a bus, just looking around, only to find some soft-skulled booger bag staring back at you, wide-eyed like it's shocked to see you, too? That's because babies stare at things they're curious about! That little sucker would put you in its mouth if it could. Staring at strangers melts stress off yourself and transfers it to whomever you're staring at.
8. Sleep In A Cage
This one's obvi, baby. The benefits of sleeping in a cage are clear. Waking up in your maximum security cell is the number one way to prepare for future tax fraud incarceration while also melting the stress away.
9. Poop Your Pants
P.U.! What stinks?? I know one thing's for sure - it's not stress. Pooping your pants is zen-level nirvana shit, very difficult to do in public places. And yet, babies do it all the time. Try cutting one off in your shorts. What's that running down your inner thigh? It's your stress melting away.
The number one reason babies live a stress-free life? They eat titty food, baby! Studies and doctors show, again and again, that sucking on titties all day is an incredible way to melt the stress away, even if it's from your own mother. I don't makes the rules; I just reports 'em.
There you have it, The Top 10 Things Babies Do Everyday That You Should, Too. What'd you think of our list? Did we get it right? Does this list make you want to change your diaper? Let us know what you think in the comments below, and be sure to like and subscribe!